QENZ Tour – Leg 03

Here I am, back again bitches! You should be on about your third bottle by now to sit through all of these photos. There’s a little bit of a hodgepodge today as you’ll see we sailed in and out of Akaroa, New Zealand. Akaroa is the cruise ship gateway to Christchurch, but requires a three hour round trip bus ride. Given the circumstances, and we only had one day in port, we decide to give Christchurch a miss. We managed to make our own fun in Akaroa though!

Thankfully we didn’t need to use these life preservers, but we were more than ready just in case. I’m sure you all heard about the Viking Sky cruise ship that had just a tad bit of a problem while at sea. Well, we were hearing about it live, and trust me, I was ready to make orange my new colour of the moment!

Akaroa was a lovely seaside town with a little more presence than Picton. The town’s main street wraps around a beachfront with shops and eateries dotting it along the way. There were plenty of the tik-tik boom tourist places, but we managed to find lots of little designy boutiques, too. Oh, and you know I managed to find the one shop that sells fabric in the whole town! The owner looked my sassy-ass up and down when I asked for half-yards of some fabric specific to New Zealand with that, “Do you know what you’re doing?” Girl. Z-snap, heal-turn, hair-flip, and yes, I do. Don’t judge a man who quilts!

Okay, this picture below is totally out of order, but I forgot! When we left Picton, the local (?) news station sent out the chopper to farewell us! Apparently, it was the first time the Queen Elizabeth had been in port so we were quasi-celebrities. We waved, cheered, and drank on, and on. And on.

Okay, sorry, back to Akaroa. How charming is this house? It’s like Barbie’s country cottage! I’m also loving the colour story that’s happening here. That blue-violet and red-orange? Throw in some white accents, pump up the saturation and I’m quilt-spired. I’m not sure of the type of person that lives here, but I wanna be their friend!

Our ladies that lunch dining experience was supposed to be top-notch. We had made reservations, it was recommended from those in town, and Mr. Sparkles was even able to get some more of his new favourite green mussels. Except. Oh lawdy, don’t cross Mr. Sparkles when it comes to his food. The mussels were laced with beards! (And not the female kind that kept us gay boys safe from high school bullies!) What type of fine dining restaurant doesn’t take the beard off a mussel? Anyway, we got a discount, but ugh, first world problems deluxe.

I didn’t pause long enough to get the gist of this sculpture, but I’m totally loving how anyone can become part of the art. It was like an interactive selfie! After lunch we spent the rest of the afternoon visiting a local art gallery, rummaging through the antique centre (I bought a broach–okay, I bought two!), and watching the scantily clad European dancers from our cruise ship frolicking on the beachfront. Guilty as charged!

As we left the sky was beautiful, the mountains serene, but as I’ve come to realise, what else is new for New Zealand? The landscape is just about as perfect as you could ask for. The blue and yellow of this seascape skyline does it about 1% justice. There were so many quiltspiration opportunities, I can’t even talk about it. Okay, maybe I am talking about it right now, but let’s just say my sketch book was very handy!

This next bit always made us laugh! As part of the schedule everyday, there was an informal LGBT social hour in the Commodore Club. We practically lived in the Commodore Club (martinis, baby), and not once did anyone ever come for the Friends of Dorothy meet and greet! Ugh, slack. I was ready to get my gay on with some of the golden oldies!

Instead, we just held court ourselves and made friends with the bartenders. I thought of changing my name to Dorothy to help inspire the participation levels, but then I would have had to fight for the bartenders’ attention. In the end, we just fully represented the entire LGBT community!

While on board we even celebrated our 14 year anniversary! Couples that cruise together, stay together! Our friends, Jono and Todd had a bottle of Pinot Grigio delivered to our room on the day. Ex-squeeze-me, someone deserves a quilted gift in return! (Adding it to the list). Not that we needed anymore alcohol, but you best believe we drank it with gusto! It would be rude not to, right?

So far, so good! After Akaroa we set sail for Dunedin, which as you’ll soon discover was one of my favourite parts of the whole ship-bang. Yep, that horizon line is a little bent: just like us. Mwah!