QENZ Tour – Leg 01

Okay all ye faithful. If you don’t wanna sit through the Molli Sparkles QENZ Tour, this is your warning to step away. However, if you like a good ole slideshow, a la 1973, pull up a crushed velvet poof and crack some bubbles for leg one. I think there are a total of four legs, but there may be a bonus round? I’m gonna space them out over a few days so you may need to adjust your crown along the way. This is for my own posterity; I must remember how good Mr. Sparkles and I look. Make sure you finish that glass (bottle?) so you’re legless by the end of it all!

Our Cunard Queen Elizabeth cruise circumnavigated the south island, over 12 days porting out of Melbourne, Australia. We had to get there somehow, and up the front is how we roll.

I wasn’t two steps out of the hotel and I had spotted some quiltspiration. Look closely and you’ll see a mistake in the pattern above. I don’t think the tile layer was Amish.

We made it aboard the ship the next day, and Port Melbourne was kind enough to give us a good send off. This is the back of the bus as we waved good bye. Where is everyone though? Cunard for two? Sometimes it felt that way!

Immediately there was inspiration every where on the ship. Carpets, walls, floors, artwork, people, nature — it was like my senses were suddenly alive. Digital detox was now in full effect.

This is how you make a grand entrance. Now! Imagine me in a black-sequinned, strapless number cinched to the nines. Ow! Yes, ow, you keep your cinching to yourself. That sweeping staircase was multiple levels and I just wanted to jump on that banister and slide all the way down. Could the carpet have been fire engine red — of course — but it would have clashed with my lippy.

Mr. Sparkles tried to get me to try his escargot, and while I love me some Pretty Woman, those slippery little suckers are not for me. He had them twice, and then got no kisses from moi.

I think I said on Instagram this about sums up my experience. Let’s compromise and say about 50% of my experience! In no way am I mad about it. Those cards were so delicious and the drinks knew how to deal a heavy hand.

Our first stop was in Picton, a small sea port town with about five streets in total. I was glad to get back on land for even a brief time, and the inspo kept flowing. I was drawing these logs in my sketch book as we were pulling into port! The smell of them was like a Yankee candle!

You can tell the sea is such an important component of the local culture. The cruise ships that arrive provide a well-needed economy to the excursions, eateries, artisans, and tacky tourist shops. Hey, we all need a job! One of the more reputable experiences is the historic Edwin Fox vessel. It’s the world’s 9th oldest ship, and amongst other things, was used to transport convicts from the UK to the new colonies.

It was rescued by amateur conservationists, re-floated, and transported to Picton. What a mammoth task, and kudos to them! You’re allowed to walk completely through and around it. What a fright and amazement to know what those passengers lived through to travel to Australia. I kept looking for Business Class — I don’t think there was any!? I’d need my own boat.

The colours: unreal. Seafoam green and peach. We desperately need to make that a thing again. Maybe we update it to moss and rust? Walking around the Edwin Fox–as it was maintained in a dry dock–was quite belittling. You were staring at 150+ years of wood and metal, and the texture of them ageing together really moved me.

Boys gotta eat. So as Mr. Sparkles was on his seafood journey, he had some of the infamous (and ginormous!) green mussels. He said they were the best he had ever had! I’ll have to believe him as I wouldn’t touch the things. No. Thank. You. But again, the colours of those shells are unreal! Is green my new colour du jour?

After food, and buying some wine (as you do in the Marlborough region of New Zealand), we headed back to the ship. We then proceeded to drink more wine, and cocktails, and champagne. Rinse, repeat. So that was leg one, and we hadn’t even got that far! What will Wellington bring? Stay tuned!