My Right To an Anniversary
This shit’s about to get personal, and not at all quilting related.
In both the USA and Australia, it’s illegal for me to marry my partner of eight years because he’s a man and, despite the sparkly pseudonym, I’m a man, too. Yes, believe it or not, I’m gay. Shock, horror. Not only have Mr. Sparkles and I been together for over eight years, but during that time I have been a co-parent to his two children from his previous marriage … to a woman. I call them my kids and they call me their dad. It’s a very modern family, and it works incredibly well. That is except if I wanted to cement my relationship with a marriage certificate from either government.
“Well, me and my religious beliefs don’t think that gay marriage should be allowed. God loves you and all, but he created Adam and Eve, not Steve.”
I currently don’t belong to any religious affiliation, so I wouldn’t want to be married in a church, or even by a member of the clergy. I would, however, like the government to recognize that I am in a committed relationship and issue me a marriage certificate like they would to ANY man and woman in a relationship that so desired one. Maybe my civics teacher was wrong when she taught me in year nine that there was a separation between the Church and the State. That they couldn’t, shouldn’t and wouldn’t dictate to each other. Yet, somehow, religion always plays into this argument. If the government is issuing my marriage certificate, I don’t need the Church involved, thanks! Besides, why are you dictating your own religious beliefs to me, or to our government? I’m sure they make you happy, so please keep them to yourself. And my name is Molli, who’s this Eve chick?
I hear you saying, “Fine, whatever, I won’t bring religion into it, but marriage is sacred and has been the same for thousands of years. We shouldn’t, no, we can’t change it now.”
Hmm, perhaps if I bribed my partner’s parents with a dowry, the government would allow it? Oh, I’ve got it, if we arranged the marriage from birth, maybe? Or how about if one of us was only fourteen and still a virgin? None of those? Okay then, it seems like the Institution of marriage has and does change, like every other social, political and cultural construct we live in today. Our modern world is ever changing, and people throughout time have adapted to it in order to survive. Maybe it is actually you who hasn’t changed for thousands of years! Oh, and I also believe marriage is sacred, which is why I want to share it with someone who I have been with for eight years.
“Okay, so bar all that, let’s call it something else completely, but it will still pretty much be the same. You know, separate but still equal.”
Listen up, bitches, if I have to drink from a different water fountain, that is not equal. If I have to sit at the back of the bus, while you sit at the front, that is not equal. If I am forced to stay home with the kids while you join the work force because you say housework is important too, that is not equal. If the government recognizes a human right allowed you, but wants me to call it something else because of gender, that is not fucking equal. Let me paraphrase: separate is separate and actually means NOT equal.
I really don’t think I’m asking for much, just the same rights that are afforded to every heterosexual person. You love someone. I love someone. Shouldn’t that be enough?
So, if you read through all of that and are still here, I must tell you, I lied a bit at the beginning, there is some quilty business to be declared! Today, June 1st, is my one year anniversary of quilting–the day I walked into Lincraft and walked out with fabric and a rotary cutter!!! What a thrilling first year it has been! I think I’ll give away some fabric to celebrate! Leave a comment to enter, and I’ll draw next weekend for this FQ from Tula Pink’s Parisville. (International, always welcome). However, if you leave a comment telling me you disagree with gay marriage, I will under no circumstances bless you with fabric–no matter how many times Mr. Randy G chooses your number. Otherwise, good luck, love and sparkles to all of you!